Being Mom

There seems to be a lot of reflection that comes with being a Mother. There is a tendency to reflect on your own childhood as your daughter grows before you at a seemingly ridiculous rate of speed. There is also a tendency to reflect on what mistakes you might be making along the way because, let’s face it, not all of us Mothers are perfect. There’s reflection when you watch the slight missteps your child might make as they remind you of your own. There’s the urge to interject, when you know you shouldn’t. Hopefully, we reflect on our mistakes and learn from these life lessons along the way.

That’s what is good about becoming a Mother. You are much more aware of the choices you make because they aren’t solely your choices any more. Hopefully you realize that there’s a delicate balance of how much involvement and parenting is necessary. Do you step in every time you feel your child may be vulnerable, or do you let them learn how to deal with certain situations on their own? My best guess is that you try and offer understanding and guidance that will ultimately help your child make their own choices along the way…and refrain from hovering like some crazed helicopter mom! It’s not always easy, especially when you have your own (sometimes strong) opinions – as the Aries in me tends to have. But I’m learning how to navigate this, because i know my daughter ultimately needs to form her own opinions and figure out what works best for her. That should be the goal: to raise an independent thinker. What I hope for the most out of our relationship is to have truly open & honest communication and, of course, an abundance of love. Although i suspect there will always be an abundance of love, as we seem to be a family of overly sensitive beings.

Some day I hope that when my daughter looks back on our relationship, it will be with love and respect. She’ll know that I’m one to readily admit my mistakes when I’ve messed up. She’ll know that I wasn’t that perfect Mother, but that I did my very best. She’ll know that my intentions were always honest and good. Most of all, she will know of unrequited love, as no one can love her as much as her parents do. We will always have her back and always be there through her ups & downs.

To my own Mom, who took on raising two young babes when she was so young herself (and then again 8 years later): I love you, and any missteps…because I know you’ve always had my back throughout all of my fumbles in life.

To all the Mothers out there: Happy Mother’s Day!

 Photos by: Jennifer Dakan & Devin Sarno